If you're going to endure years - 14 of them to be exact- of futility and heartbreak, when you finally do win a DOL championship, it may as well be a memorable one.

...Less than a minute to go in the ball game, the game tied, a DOL Bowl championship on the line... Wait.... I'm getting a head of myself, lets go back to the beginning.

It was year fourteen of DOL, and tenth with Hathaway at the helm. The league was fresh off of being recognized by ESPN as one of the nation's best and moral was at an all time high. As has become the norm, Hathaway made some additions to the website in the off-season, adding a hall of recognition for player MVP's, revamping of the uniform halls and complete history of the DOL Bowl. The roster of talent stayed consistent through the off-season, with only Daniel Lunsford retiring just before the start of the season. But with long time member, and brother, Weston still leading Lunsford inc, the team didnt miss a beat and, in fact, prospered...and it started with the first pick of the draft..

With the number one pick of the 14th annual DOL draft, Weston Lunsford selected Wide Receiver, Antonio Brown. Brown, who was expected to lead the league in all categories, fell short of some of those expected numbers- but did enough to earn owner Weston Lunsford his 50th career regular season win and get Lunsford inc back to the DOL Bowl for the first time since their magical 2009 championship run. "Playing with house money" was how Lunsford described the pressure to win being nearly non existent after barely sliding into the playoffs as the 6th seed-earning the Rocky Balboa Comeback of the Year award and nearly pulling the whole thing off in the end.

For the second straight year, injuries affected the league immensely. None more than Hall of Famers Hathaway and Bentley. Hathaway saw what he thought was one of his best teams ever fall apart with every member of his starting lineup from week 8 being injured resulting in 4 straight losses to end the regular season and a first round loss to rival Jacob Jordan in the playoffs. Taf Bentley would see his injuries cost him missing out on the playoffs entirely, ending a league record 8 straight post-season appearances.

Loss and heartbreak would rear it's ugly head for long time member Troy Jordan and T-Roy inc as well, missing out on the playoffs entirely and falling to Ashton Jernigan in the ACC Championship game in what could only be described as "a rough season."

The ACC Championship win for Jernigan was a high point in an otherwise dissapointing, yet very eventful 2016 for the one-time DOL champion. The year started off with an affair scandal for Jernigan as he was rumored to be spotted out on the town with long time actress, and DOL trophy namesake, Tiffany Amber Theissen- Saved by the Bell's Kelly Kapowski. The tabloid banter kept coming as well as he was spotted out at a nude camp retreat with Seth Rogan just weeks after losing his first round pick Adrian Peterson to injury. "We got off to an interesting start this season," said A-Train inc. owner Ashton Jernigan, "But we bounced back strong and earned back the entry fee."

Awarding the ACC Champion their entry fee back was one of the very few changes the Unity Council implimented in the 2016 season. The only other submission to pass in 2016 was to allow the draft order for next season to be chosen in the order of previous finish. For example, the winner would choose what draft pick they want, followed by the second place finisher, etc. etc.

Who will get the short end of that stick next season? Creel inc. owner, Jonathan Creel- who, thanks to terrible luck and bad scheduling, finished dead last for a second straight year. Creel scored the 3rd most points in the league this season with a roster that consisted of running back's Ezekial Elliott and LeVeon Bell. Yet, had the 3rd most points scored on him thus resulting in a 12th place finish yet again. He did come away from the season with a Best Team Picture Award and an $80 Survivor Pot.

The biggest beneficiary of scheduling and that good ol' Irish luck? Hall of Famer and founding father William Spencer. For also the second straight season, Spencer finished with the third least amount of point scored offensively on the year, but used stout defense to earn his 100th all-time regular season win and his third division championship. His luck would run out, however, as a quick exit from the playoffs resulted in a very un-common (for Spencer) 0-2 bbq for his organization.

Hank Hullett would also get in on the record setting in 2016 as he earned the Sally O Malley 50 All Time Regular Season wins award. Bob Lowe would earn his 60th all time win and the Lowe's would even spend time at number one for a week or two this season, but both Hullett and Lowe would miss the playoffs and struggle at or below. 500 for much of year 14.

The defending champion in West's sophomore season would pencil together another successful year, churning out 8 wins on the regular season while earning a first round BYE in the playoffs. West's reign would come to an abrupt end, however, as Lunsford pulled a massive upset in the Final Four, pumping the breaks on any hopes at a repeat performance.

Three times in history has a team won 11 regular season games during the year, setting or tying the all time regular season wins record.....and nearly every time has been massively upset in the Final Four of the playoffs. This year would be no different as Whitson inc. owner, Stephen, became the latest victim of the 11-win curse. Whitson rolled out 7 straight wins to open the regular season before finally losing their only game of the season to the defending champion in Preston West in Week 8. Racking up the number one overall seed, quarterback Drew Brees earning the MVP, the Benny The Jet Rodriguez most points scored award and the division championship, Whitson seemed poised to win his second DOL Championship. That was until they ran into a brick wall in the Final Four. Scoring a season low 88 points on the week, it would be Jacob Jordan advancing to DOL Bowl XIV, while Stephen and his Ellavators club were forced to settle for a third place finish- their best since that magical, first 2011 season.

They were just no match for fate.

As fate taketh away, she also giveth and in that magical way only she can.

Founding Father, Jacob Jordan's story has been well documented. A league leading three time bridesmaid, and never a bride, Jordan found himself squeezing ever so slightly back into the playoffs. With a 6-6 record on the season and barely sliding into the mix as the 5th seed, adversity reared it's ugly head with a path back to the DOL Bowl not only seeming like a distant goal, but one that would have to go through the #1 seed to get there. But, lady luck would smile on Jake inc. and for the fourth time in his 14 year DOL career, he would find himself playing again for the championship, this time in a rematch of DOL Bowl VII... vs Weston inc.

Now... where was I? ah yes....

...Less than a minute to go in the ball game, the game tied, a DOL Bowl championship on the line...

With a tie, the tie-breaker goes to the team with the most bench points scored, that team... was Weston inc's Peyton on Sunday Mornings squad. With less than a minute to go in the game and only the defense on the field for Jake inc. it looked like another loss for Jordan in the DOL Bowl and a second championship for Lunsford inc.

Then it happened.


In a meaningless, garbage time play with 46 seconds left, it was Jamison Crowder who couldnt hold onto the football. With a defensive fumble recovery, the tie was broken, giving Jordan the two points he needed to become what he has yearned for since the inception of the league....a DOL Championship.

One Jake inc. fan held a sign: "Now I can die in peace."

That sleep will no longer be tortured by old memories - of collapses in 2003, 2007 and 2009, and talk of curses and blame placed on league commissioners of past and current.

...and it is only fitting that as we approach the 15th anniversary of DOL - the one that started it all in 2003 as commissioner would finally get his turn....

...as champion.


2016: (ESPN)
League Name: D.O.L
1. White Clayton Bigsby- Jacob Jordan (6-6)
2. Peyton on Sunday Mornings- Weston Lunsford (6-6)
3. Whitson Ellavators- Stephen Whitson (11-1)
4. Sophomore Slumping- Preston West (8-4)
5. Globo Gym Purple Cobras- Bryan Hathaway (6-6)
6. The Oopty Oop- Will Spencer (8-4)
7. Kaepernick's Patriots- Ashton Jernigan (4-8)
8. Muchentuchen Resturaunt Chain- Troy Jordan (5-7)
9. The Handshake From Predator- Hank Hullett (6-6)
10. The Butcher of Brentwood- Taf Bentley (5-7)
11. God Hates Jags- Bob/Zane Lowe (4-8)
12. Dak to the Future- Jonathan Creel (3-9)

(Regular Season Only)
Most Points Scored: 176.3- White Clayton Bigsby (Week 3 Regular Season)
Least Points Scored: 61- Kaepernick's Patriots (Week 2 Regular Season)
Most Total Points Scored: 1573.1- Whitson Ellavators
Least Total Points Scored: 1348.6- The Handshake From Predator